There Is A Real Dynamic

  • Collect Moments, Not Things

    Why the need to possess instead of the desire to belong?

    When searching for a present for my family for Christmas, I hoped to offer them something “nice” and not just “another thing”. Christmas is always a milestone, it brings the family together and the year to an end, hoping to reflect together on what comes next. It never seems to be associated with a lamp, accessories, or T-shirt.

    I’ve never been keen on acquiring material possessions, not for myself either. I often find the time spent in shops to be a waste of precious life moments. As well as spending hard-earned money only to give it back, I feel the weight of unused items piling up around us, creating clutter in our daily lives and in our minds.

    Some of my close friends and family still believe in the necessity of things, mainly for professional or social reasons, or to fill a perceived void. We’ve all experienced or witnessed first-hand how shopping and food become traditional compensations for all the inconveniences life can bring. I’ve seen the consequences and the weight of hoarding.

    “I can leave any place in 24 hours, with one suitcase, as long as my wife is with me.”

    My father

    Things matter only to the extent that we know why they are here and serve a practical purpose in our lives—or as Marie Kondo puts it, bring a sense of joy.

    A few years ago, I discovered the Minimalist movement, which articulates the need to declutter and create space in life, both physically and mentally. I firmly believe in this principle; limiting the mess around us offers more peace of mind.

    Here are some tips we have adopted:

    1. Invest in items, and only consider good quality, as you will live with it for a few years.
    2. Embrace a policy of no new things, only replacements. Not everything needs to be replaced; consider the necessity first as usage changes and life evolves.
    3. Practice patience, especially with children who tend to forget half of the things they want and change their minds about the remaining half. I let them ask a few times over a few weeks before buying a new item. 
    4. Prioritise spending on creating moments rather than things. If you need to hold something in your hands, cultural products such as books and music, group games offer great alternatives and bring joy to our days.

    So for Christmas this year, we are offering the family to share a unique experience, traveling in time to visit the Chateau de Versailles during the Louis XIV period. Let’s hope it will be a moment to remember! 

    Merry Christmas to all and – hopefully – see you next year! 

  • Stopping micro-management

    Lately I tried micro management, and it was not a major success.

    I experience some flaws in a colleagues work, mistake and oversights, on matters wich concerned my unit. I asked around to find out if that was common in his work for other teams and it appears that it was. The lad was overworked, overstressed and in a few weeks from his holidays. Everyone was hoping of a quick recovery after this break. I then chose to micromanage him until the break. This entailed:

    • Checking various times a day that he has done what he promised, to guarantee on time delivery,
    • Booking time slot reminder in his diary for missions he was supposed to execute with my team, to guarantee fulfillments,
    • Reading the correspondance he sent in my teams name, to ensure clarity and exactness,
    • Pulling him off any non priority projects, to release some pressure on his shoulder;

    Despite my efforts, I missed a major misunderstanding of my colleague, leading to larger problem that the client did not appreciate. We could resolve the problem before anything major occurred. I had the feeling I wasted a lot of time in supervising to avoid the unavoidable. I face criticisms despite my every efforts which had a taste of injustice but they were actually right in a sense.

    I was completely mislead – as we sat in the same briefing and received the same next steps – to believe we both understood the outcome. Micromanaging made me believe I was on top of things, where I was not as the problem was already there before I started. No one can rewrite the past, so i took on the lesson and make sure I understand the most important parameters before managing the execution.

    Now, I am working on my method, involving a step by step approach :

    • Preparation first to ensure deep understanding,
    • Assessing the knowledge necessary to execute the task,
    • Brief the team to get them to comprehend the whole picture,
    • Assign an owner to deepen
    • Make sure the team has the elements to move forwards owing their mission,
    • Be present for the team to help with decisions when experience is needed
    • Support workload to guarantee timely delivery.

    Changing is hard, even for an adaptable person. I am keen on efficiency and I do hope people will crave understanding which would force me into explaining every single details, but they don’t always have this level of natural engagement. I need to ground myself to be meticulously sharing details and cues for my team to feed on. At the same time I am afraid of information overload which could lead them to more confusion, hence my habit of not giving too much at a time.

    I would love to have your experience on how you manage the project setting in a complex environment with limited ressources, I am sure some around have useful tricks and solutions which would apply to all. Do not hesitate to share.

  • Asking questions

    Man should rather spend an hour with a wise man than ten years in books.

    A Chinese proverb

    As an unexperienced adult, I was not afraid to ask questions as I did not have much to loose. It was easy to ask but it did not always mean that young people have the right questions just yet. When one grows old, one may have the right questions but not always the will to risk anything to obtain an answer.

    Everyone should believe in its own right to become a better person by learning something new everyday – the easy way to do this is actually to ask questions.

    By asking questions, I realised that the majority of my surroundings were happy to share answers, experiences, information and even personal wisdom. This can create a virtuous circle that give again more will to ask, but also accept when there is not a positive feedback. I am grateful everyday for the chance I have to be so well supported and equipped with others knowledge to move forwards.

    Spanish are pragmatic, they have a proverb which reads “el no ja lo tienes “: the “no” you already have. I have to admit that it came in my life as a revelation of something I know deep in my heart but had not yet put words on.

    Go ahead – ask – nothing is to be lost anyway.

    If you need one extra reason for asking questions, remember that it keeps the conversation going between you and your network.

    « What to ask? » one might say.

    In a professional context, there are 4 simple starting points:

    • Example: when explained a theory, one can believe it is clear, but examples are never useless to picture clearly.
    • Context: when describe a situation or told an experience, the teller do not always provide context and usually have one angle of view. Do not hesitate to question context to understand better where the story comes from.
    • Outcome: what happen after the end of the story ? What were the consequences or learning to take out of the story.
    • Resource: if the topics interests you, do not hesitate to request extra material and ressources to get a deeper understanding of it.

    In a personal context or during networking events or ice-breaking exercise, you may need to include other types of questions.

    Check the following lists as fun to read as it can be awkward to use, but it gives you some good examples.